Tuesday, 23 June 2009

me oh my



Oh, noose


Tied myself in, tied myself too tight


Looking kind of anxious in your cross-armed stance


Like a bad tempered prom queen at a homecoming dance


And I claim I'm not excited with my life anymore


So I blame this town, this job, these friends, the truth is it's myself


And I'm trying to understand myself and pinpoint who I am


When I finally get it figured out, I've changed the whole damn plan




Oh, noose


Tied myself in, tied myself too tight


Oh, noose


Tied myself in, tied myself too tight


Talking shit about a pretty sunset


Blanketing opinions that I'll probably regret soon


Changed my mind so much I can't even trust it


My mind changed me so much I can't even trust myself








on a lighter note i pissed in a punch bowl at a party and someone drank it.




holler


Thursday, 11 June 2009

Leeds, Stag & Dagger

for (www.musosguide.com)

Stag & Dagger Leeds
Friday May 22
Various Venues


It would be easy to dismiss an event sponsored by Vice and Firetrap as cheap throwaway hipster nonsense. It would also be easy to look at the majority of the crowd and expect the same. A Bravery for 2009 perhaps. But then there’s the matter of the most impressive and varied lineups ever to grace the working men’s clubs and University bars of Leeds.

First on the agenda are Abe Vigoda at TJs Woodhouse, branding the audience with their own brand of tropical power-punk. Despite a recent lineup change and near constant technical difficulties the Los Angeles four-piece give a tight and thoroughly agreeable performance, climaxing with a joyous rendition of ‘Skeleton’. Abe Vigoda, unfortunately, have the problem that they are followed on the bill by three of the greatest live acts of today, so many of the nuances and fine distinction of their intricate guitar lines grow hazy in memory.

Crystal Antlers do not suffer from this problem. On record they pass themselves off as a fairly dull and trite affair, but stick the guys on a stage and suddenly a whole new beast is created. The wall of noise sound, intercepted by bongo rhythms and wailing vocals perfectly suit the fairly diminutive surroundings, giving the impression of a primal explosion of noise. Crystal Antlers are complimented perfectly by the visceral delights of White Denim who seem intent on allowing their fans to expel their entire bodily fluids through their foreheads with an unstoppable half hour jam of Workout Holiday favourites and newies, cutting and pasting sections of different songs together to create a patchwork setlist that makes them simply irresistible and sends a jolt of electricity through the packed out crowd. It would be easy to dismiss White Denim as the sum of their parts, southern rock MC5 wannabes perhaps, but their performances certainly are unique.

The Mae Shi step up to the plate next, with the solid groundwork of a band renowned for their chaotic and charismatic live shows. It’s a shame then that something may have been lost somewhere over the Atlantic, because for the majority of their set, try as they mae (sorry) they can’t seem to find the magic today. Perhaps it could be attributed to the loss of a member or to several overzealous superfans jumping into a fairly sparse crowd but the first several songs fall rather flat. Despite these early jitters the band manage to pull out few tricks from their sleeves, covering the crowd in a giant tent and a sit-down singalong pull in the strays from the bar and the added numbers create an atmosphere sorely missing for the first half of the set. The Shi respond in kind, hugging stage invaders and throwing themselves into the throng at every opportunity before launching into a superb rendition of ‘Run to Your Grave’. The pinnacle of the night comes as security pull the plug, the band grab their mics and serenade the audience to cries of ‘Fuck the Police’ goading fans onto the stage for one final dance before they’re on their merry way.

A quick jog over town leads to the Brudenell brings the band with easily the biggest buzz surrounding them, Cursive. Dinosaurs of the alt-rock world their devoted fanbase is out in force to scream every lyric from the bottom of their lungs into the ears of anyone who cares to listen. On record their writhing anthems can create a sense of real emotion and raw feeling but on stage all they cause is numb feet and the urge to squeeze out for a cigarette. A below-par setlist consisting mostly of songs from new album Mama I’m Swollen, falls distinctly flat each song merging into a grey pulp of sound, nothing distinct or particularly impressive. Perhaps it would be unfair to compare the performance with those seen earlier. Cursive certainly would not feel the need to resort to gimmicks or trickery to win over an audience, but the standalone properties of many of the songs on show wasn’t enough to warrant watching a miserable old man ranting at screaming fanboys.

Just an opinion.

Wednesday, 15 April 2009

God Help The Girl

(for www.musosguide.com)

God Help The Girl
Come Monday Night

In the three years since The Life Persuit it would be totally unfair to say Belle & Sebastian’s fan-base has diminished, as any cardigan-cocooned fop will testify, but perhaps it is fair to say that anticipation of new output from Stuart Murdoch isn’t quite at the giddy peaks it reached around the time of the classy If You’re Feeling Sinister.
Interestingly Murdock’s has chosen to stake a step away from his band of merry Scots with new project God Help The Girl. ‘Come Monday Night’ is set to be pieced into a concept album of sorts, involving grandiose strings and a vague idea of storytelling, sound-tracking a musical film of Murdock’s own creation.
This may all sound like the makings of an insane, Prince-esque vanity project but the track itself is a slice of ‘60s indebted sweet and soulful balladry, swooning over a sunny London day. From the outset the track conjures to mind very prominent reference points of Bryter Later era Nick Drake, with bittersweet vocals that could easily be mistaken for those of Nico. Lyrically, the song is very similar to Murdock’s previous output, revelling in the quirky reference points and clever puns that made Belle and Sebastian so popular to the romantically minded, opting for a simplistic approach to daily monotony.
“Come Monday night/the day of work is done/Tuesday morning looms/the grey of ordinariness”
Rather than a ham fisted attempt at retro-chic this naivety creates a charming and loveable atmosphere.
'Come Monday Night' is hindered by its insistence at aping its relative influences, but still manages to conjure up a slice of enjoyable sweeping pop nostalgia – despite never straying far from safe territory.

Sunday, 29 March 2009

Writingzz

We creatures who dream of our own mortality
Who think of our deaths and then turn to our coffee
And scan the news for the hate and atrocity
And speak offhand ‘its oh such a tragedy’

We lie and we steal to feed our own egos
To pathologically turn our lives into shows
We are the characters who will never ever change
Create the same problems again and again

The statements we swear that we live our lives by
Are changed the next day to fit our changing lives
The situation’s not perfect, neither are our thoughts
But we say that we live by some book we have bought

A theory you pay your hard cash for
To make you have purpose, to make you want more
From the hole you have dug, the grain in your hand
To be more assertive, more specific demand

Can you fit your whole thesis in the lines of a song
Or will it just change when your needs move along
For something more fitting, to all your desire
Do you feel support? Do you grimace or smile?

Sunday, 15 March 2009

Dinosaur Pile Up

Dinosaur Pile-Up
City Screen Basement

Imagine the worst gig you have ever been to. Chances are it was a shambolic event, maybe a PA broke or the singer stormed off. These are pretty standard grievances which go hand in hand with the clichés and pitfalls of rock ‘n roll, but my main gripe will always remain the middle of the road.
Dinosaur Pile-Up are a fairly interesting new band, dark basslines and crunching guitars mixed with enough shoutalong choruses to peacefully blend mass-appeal and blogger’s delight. Couple this with a tiny, intimate venue and enough hype to pack it to the rafters and it seems the scene is set for a myth inducing event soon to be the parable of the word on the grubby street. But, unfortunately everything runs smoothly. Too smoothly.Following a slew of dire indie-by-the-numbers support bands DPU take to the humid stage surrounded entirely in a pincer movement of hungry punters. Despite their rapidly increasing repertoire of anthemic gems every track seems to slide easily into the next with the minimum of banter or elation, the non-plussed crowd never really entering the spirit. Take nothing away from Dinosaur Pile-Up’s musicianship, every song is played expertly and with a minimum of fuss but by busting out easily their best track (the fantastic ‘Love is a boat & we’re sinking) in the opening ten minutes they crash the nail directly into their own coffin. Even drunken students wandering the stage and thrusting behind band members cannot bring excitement to what is a very disappointing and dull gig.

Monday, 2 March 2009

The Bar Is A Beautiful Place (short story)

“I think I actually, like, fell asleep in the middle.” This clearly gains a positive reaction as someone actually lets out a noise certainly on a par with an elated pig inhaling. I stand up and unsteadily head through the strobe lights towards the bar, wrapping my ankles on a stray jacket and almost nosediving onto the gooey floor.
The bar-woman is stern faced and addresses me with as few syllables as possible. I point fixedly a drink offer for ‘Tuesday Madness’ and she returns after a few minutes with a double whiskey. Her features melt and contort in the uncomfortable heat. Heading back to my seat something completely unfathomable happens and I wake up in gutter around 4am smelling distinctly of urine and cigarettes.

The next night is planned much better and I am sitting alone quite happily in a 50s theme establishment with my head on the sleek surface of the bar humming ‘American Pie’. The staff are clearly well-trained and a different member of staff attends to me every half hour or so to check for vital signs without even the slightest hint of a smile.

Thursday night is the low-point of a week devoid of anything other than low-points. I can’t seem to reach anything beyond the stage of mildly intoxicated and every single one of my friends is an intolerable bore. I get a taxi home alone around 1am and sleep soundly. I dream of floating in a swimming pool in a shining light as the sides slowly deteriorate and dissolve in the chlorine until I lie in an endless ocean staring at the light and rotating slowly akin to a giant microwave.

I am invigorated and hopeful as the doors open and my eyes adjust to the intermittent lights and my nose composes itself from the sting of dry ice. After several drinks I am exposed to everyone’s greatest wit and observations, laughing like a hyena at a story about a friend of a friend who once got his head stuck in a blender and someone’s far cousin who once fell into a grain silo. As the day fades into the Sabbath my body relaxes accordingly on a subconscious level and I happily play out the rest of the night in a soft, comfortable corner sipping cheap wine and meeting those who happen to pass my way with kind words and clever remarks. Recognisable faces are met with dramatic exclamations and wonderfully insightful conversations bordering on the two-minute mark before excuses are made and we part company.

I stand in the shower for close to an hour, head rested on the wall, my fingertips contoured at steep echelons before stumbling into my room and collapsing on the bed. Most of daylight passed without me and I am greeted by a strange feeling of disorientation at the sight of the setting sun. After a few minutes enjoying a level of hush I make my way to the kitchen for a glass of water, dusting the crust from my eyelashes and coughing out the taste of cigarettes.

Thursday, 12 February 2009

Break Up The Makedown

Five Bands Went out at Their Peak



1) The Velvet Underground



'Squeeze' was not a VU album. Doug Yule was a tosser.



2) Life Without Buildings



Wonderous twee-indie from Glasgow (where else) with a kraut twist, lasting three excellent years before parting company. Their only studio album, 'Any Other City', is a classy muddled ranting masterpiece, perched somewhere between Camera Obscura and The Vaselines.
Complete with marvellously un-rockstar names such as Sue Tomkins and Chris Evans they were the antithesis of everything loathesome in the depressing Travis led early 2000s British indie scene. They were helped on their path to cult status by the fact that in 'The Leanover' they may well have had the best song ever at their disposal.
Tomkins has since taken her tender stream-of-consciousness style to the Tate with a series of spoken word pieces. Chris Evans floundered after the dissolution of TFI Friday, divorced Billie and blew a wad of money on Richard E Grant's coat from Withnail & I.



3) Neutral Milk Hotel



Could any break-up list ever really be complete without them?
Two albums of innduendo swathed, string laden beauties were enough for Jeff Mangum before he presumably collapsed under the weight of his own genius/insanity and went to live in the woods somewhere, crooning at insects about semen. Tremendous.



4) Death From Above 1979



Exploded out of Canada and onto the pages of every British music rag as a perfect antidote to the identikit floppy brown post-punk revival with 2004's most vital and violent album, 'You're a Woman & I'm A Machine'. Went on to bait the press at every opportunity by calling the British music scene shit and writing songs about menstruation and the joys of rejecting contraception. Hated themselves and everyone else and split up a year later.



5) The Replacements



The epitome of both rock n' roll excess and authenticity. Crafted both fantastic balls-out punk rock and desperate isolated tearjerkers, serving albums as emotional rollercoasters. A band of demented alcoholics who would much rather write songs about erections (Gary's Got A Boner) than sell out arenas.
Rejected the mainstream in the early 80s at a time 99% of American rock was begging for MTV commodification and a slice of R.E.M's major label college-rock cash, baiting the juggernaut with the bile spitting 'Seen Your Video' (from their magnus opus 'Let It Be) and making a beautiful anti-video for biggest hit 'Bastards of Young' by filiming a speaker for 3 and half minutes. Collapsed into a fitting heap in 1991 plagued by death and drug-abuse.



'Seen Your Video, It's only rock n' roll, We don't wanna know, It's only rock n' roll.'